Once upon a time, I had aspirations. Some of you may remember what those are. They’re the things that you tell yourself you’re going to do before you die/grow-up/get married/whatever. Now, some of those are clearly not going to happen for me. After much consideration, I’ve admitted that it’s unlikely that I’m going to win the Nobel Prize. It also appears that my chances of becoming an astronaut are dim at best. And despite my best efforts, I must sadly admit that I am indeed not the very model of a Modern Major General (can’t write a washing bill in Babylonic Cuneiform, and I was never good at acrostics).

But even in my old age I’d like to think that some of my childhood dreams are still attainable. With that in mind, I’d like to dust off one that I’ve been putting off for some time: Eat the perfect cake.

To this end I want some opinions. What’s the best cake, and how do I get it? Keep in mind, there’s no way I’m baking the damn thing. I don’t care how good a made-from-scratch homemade cake is. Not going to happen. And I’m not paying more than $50 for it. Nor am I going to fly to France or some god awful place for it. If I can get it delivered, all’s well. But I’m not traveling for frickin’ cake. I just want cake. Awesome cake. Ice cream optional.

What’s the best cake you’ve ever had?