I am writing this post in response to two comments made on a post at Ambivablog on the teenage culture of oral sex. That post is a response to an Atlantic Monthly essay on the development of that culture. Essentially, Amba argues, the culture is bad for girls because it takes sexuality out of the larger context of the whole person. Amber Stuart responds in comments saying that this culture helps to build self esteem in both girls and boys. Amber Stuart's comments bother me for a number of reasons, both personally and philosophically; I will take each in turn. I think it important to note here, that this is not an argument against oral sex for all people in all situations (that can be discussed some other time), but against casual sexuality amongst teens. Continue reading →