Gloom and Doom

I learned that today is considered the most depressing day of the year from a news broadcast. Apparently, it's because today's the day when people wake up, realize they won't really make good on all of those New Year's Resolutions, and life goes on.

You're kidding me, right? That's what makes today the most depressing day of the year? If the news is going to go all gloom-and-doom on me, I expect some freakin' gloom and doom. I mean, seriously! Today's the most depressing day of the year because people break their stupid resolutions that they probably only made because they were a little drunk and maybe feeling guilty? Please. You want to talk about depressing? Try the day my kindergarten teacher told my class that we could all grow up to do whatever we wanted, and I said that we can't all be astronauts because they only have room for 5-6 people in the space shuttle. Oh man, talk about an awkward recess…

Bitterman

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