"Type ‘diet regimens’ into the Google.com search engine, and you’ll get over 40,000 hits. They’ve got the water diet, the high-fiber diet, the drinker’s diet, the high protein diet, the sugar-busters diet and so on, ad nauseam. The fact is, people plagued by persistent weight problems will try anything to lose a few grams. Now Hanashi no Channel (May 1) offers what it claims is an ideal regimen that, while highly economical, improves muscle tone and consumes calories, while contributing to a slimmer figure. It’s the ‘Masturbator’s Diet.’"