It must suck to have to bribe thieves with beer to not trash your place. I wonder if you could bribe cops with donuts to catch said thieves.
“BERLIN (Reuters) – A German construction worker fed up with burglars breaking into his mobile home decided to leave the door unlocked and put up a sign reading ‘Beer in fridge, please don’t damage anything,’ police said Wednesday.”
Some there may be more talking cats on the block. As for what they’d say, my guess is “Serve me, inferior creature”.
What Your Cat Is Trying to Tell You
“TOKYO (Reuters) – Now that you can interpret what your dog is saying, how about your cat?”
I couldn’t think of any good puns to start off this post.
“…he would go to his death with a pun half-formed, if he could think of nothing better.- Patrick O’Brian”
Punsters saw sausage hit a far cry from foul
“Let us today sing the praises of the pun. In an increasingly grim world, in which all frolic seems to have fled, the subversive art of the punster stands ready to render serious events ludicrous.
“I’m a woman trapped in a man’s body. Wait, no, I’m an amputee stuck in a healthy body!” I think the gene pool needs a little chlorine.
Amputee wannabes
Why do some people want their healthy limbs removed?
By Carl Elliott
“SLATE.COM July 10 — Baz remembers first seeing an amputee when he was a 4-year old boy in Liverpool. By the time he was 7 he had begun to think, ‘This is the way I should be.’ It was not until Baz was in his 50s, however, that he actually had his leg amputated. Baz froze his leg in dry ice until it was irreversibly damaged, then persuaded a surgeon to complete the job. When he awoke from the anesthetic and his left leg was gone, he says, ‘All my torment had disappeared.'”